


Never the Favorite

by We_deserve_rainbows



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Crying, Depression, Insecurity, lying
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-21
Updated: 2019-07-21
Packaged: 2020-07-10 05:17:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19900444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/We_deserve_rainbows/pseuds/We_deserve_rainbows
Summary: Roman is never the favorite, Always last in polls, never focused on, and no matter how hard he tries, it really gets to him.





	Never the Favorite

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you like it :3

It was a few days after the new video had gone up and Roman was sitting in his room on his computer looking at tumblr, seeing all the love that the other sides were getting in fanart and theories, and him being just a side piece or not mentioned at all. He really tried to not let it get to him but it was so hard to see that he was never anyone's favorite and it hurt when he was always in last place in “whos your favorite side?” quizzes. He saw that he was the least liked, even compared to Deceit and Remus, but he was fine, he didn't even care, he didn't need their love. Roman noticed that he was starting to tear up at the realization and he closed his computer, bathing his entire room in darkness. Tears started to trickle down his face in the darkness but he dried his tears and got up to turn on his light he could deal with this, he was the brave one after all. He flicked his light on and got his favorite journal and his calligraphy pen that had gold ink and sat on his bed to try and ignore the tears that persistently filled his eyes. 

After trying to finish a poem that he had been working on for a while he put his journal on his nightstand and attempted to go to sleep, it proved difficult however. He kept thinking about how much more popular Remus already was than him and it just made him miserable to think that it hadn't even been 72 hours and he was once again the least popular side but he put on some music and pushed those thoughts out of his head to fall into a bitter sleep. 

As Roman slowly woke up from a restless night he heard the other sides going about their mornings outside of his room and he felt a wave of demotivation crash over him as he buried himself further under his covers. He stayed like that for what felt like nothing and just laid there, not really thinking about anything, not feeling anything. When Patton came into his room Roman didn't do anything as he walked softly over to his bed. When he felt a slight dip in his bed and a worried voice say, “You've been in here all day, are you feeling alright kiddo?” Roman sat up for the first time all day and shot a bleary glare at Patton,

“I’m fine Patton, please leave me alone,” Roman swung his legs of the bed and stood up, “I'll be out soon,” He said to Patton, trying his best to sound fine. Patton stoop up and shot Roman a worried glance before closing Romans door behind him. Roman sighed and sat back down, exhausted, he rubbed his eyes and began what felt like the enormous task of getting dressed. Once he was dressed he walked out of his room, subconsciously hunching over and hiding his hands in his sleeves. He went in the kitchen and saw Logan pouring himself a cup of coffee. When Logan noticed Roman in the kitchen he briefly glanced at him before returning his attention to his coffee and saying, 

“Good evening Roman,” Romans hollow eyes looked at Logan and he deeply sighed. When he heard that uncharacteristic sound from the usually peppy and romantic side he abruptly stopped pouring his coffee, “Roman,” he hesitated, “are you feeling okay?” Roman looked at his with tired eyes and wordlessly got a mug from the cupboard, “I’m aware that im not the best at,” he paused with a shudder, “emotions, but I would still enjoy it if you were happy,”

Roman felt a tiny smile tug at the corner of his mouth when he heard that his friend actually did care about him, “It's okay Logan,” the lie rolled easily off his tongue, he had to make Logan happy after all, “just feeling a bit off,” he smiled at Logan to sell the lie and ease any worrying, he was totally fine. Logan raised a suspicious eyebrow but elected to finish making his coffee and walk out of the room, glancing worriedly at Roman who was starting to pour his own cup of coffee, not looking back at Logan. By the time Logan had disappeared behind a corner Roman had finished pouring his coffee and instead of adding cream and sugar like he usually did he tossed back the scalding black coffee without a second thought. A few moments later he set his empty mug in the sink and moped back to his room, he closed the door and slid down to his floor, utterly exhausted. Roman felt his eyes fill with tears as he let out a cry of frustration, he had no reason to be tired, he didn't even DO anything today. Roman pulled his knees to his chest and let the tears pour, he got his phone out of his pocket and switched to twitter and searched the #sanderssides tag. All he saw was appreciation for Logan, and theories about Virgil, and fanart of Remus, nothing about him. He let out a broken sob and fell to lie completely on the floor.

All of the sudden he let out a cry of fury tainted by melancholy and threw his phone across the room. He got up and started pacing, furious about his situation. Why should he be the least popular? Why should all of the dark sides beat him out? As he was ranting in his head a small voice whispered, “You know why,” Roman stopped pacing, “It's because you’re the worst side, you've always known, and now everybody knows too,” as he came to this realization he sat down on his bed and put his head in his hands. He knew it was true, he was always just trying to lie to himself, to believe that he was worth anything, that he deserved to be friends with the other sides. But the truth was, he was worthless and he didn't deserve to know Patton, or Logan, or Virgil. He laid down on his bed and let the tears fall while he thought about this unpleasant truth.

**Author's Note:**

> So what did you think? Should I continue it?


End file.
